Tag Archives: coaching

Old Dog, New Tricks

How often have we heard the phrase “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”

Thirty years ago neural researchers would have sworn that mental development ended in your twenties.  The prevailing theory was that “the brain simply didn’t undergo any significant change in capacity after late adolescence” (Immunity to Change, Kegan, and Lahey).  Imagine that.

Fast forward 30 years and studies show the brain has the ability to continue to adapt throughout life. Why is that important? We are living longer, and the longer we live the more we need to continue to learn and grow.  Not just because of the demand, but also the desire.

Desire is a key point.  If we desire change, we will strive to achieve it.  If change is demanded, we tend to resist.  How is this reflected in change?

Desire vs Demand

My dad was over 65 when he decided to learn how to snowboard.  He wanted to snowboard so he would have something in common with his grandkids.  Desire was strong, demand was absent.

My husband is almost 69 years old.  He is the “go to” guy for tech support within our house and amongst his employees, friends, and family.  He feels a need to embrace technology to support his family, friends, and business.  Both desire and demand are strong.

At 50 I embarked on a new career: coaching and organizing.  I have a passion for helping people break through their physical and emotional clutter to help them create the lives they want to live, not the life they feel stuck in.  Both desire and demand are strong.

We have some friends that are taking up golf in their 60s.  Now, golf is not an easy sport and can be incredibly frustrating, but they just keep going.  Desire is strong, demand is absent.

Again with my dad.  He was an electrical inspector.  He loved his job.  He met the most amazing people, and couldn’t wait to get into the office every day to see his office colleagues.  Then technology raised it’s ugly head when my dad was about 65.  He was now required to receive and file his inspection reports on a computer.  He was able to give up his commute to the office but missed seeing his colleagues and the technology kicked his you know what. He couldn’t (didn’t want to) get the hang of it.  Demand was strong, the desire was absent.  He retired.

When you are handed a new challenge, how do you see it?  Desire vs demand?  Are you more inclined to try harder one way or the other?  Does it change your perspective on the challenge?  How would a perspective shift help?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

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www.organizetosimplify.com

 

 

 

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

 

 

 

International Coach Federation

 

 

 

 

Professional Resource Member

 

 

 

Coach Approach for Organizers

 

 

 

 

Institute for Challenging Disorganization

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD

 

 

 

Pause. Patience. Perspective.

Parts of the yesterday really tried my patience.

I had a wonderful opportunity to visit a friend in her new home and play a round of golf in beautiful 84-degree weather.  The day was magical . . . until I started what should have been a 2-1/2 hour trek home.

Then I encountered . . . .

Accidents:  Four of them to be exact.  It was during commute time.  There were no “alternate routes” available.  These four accidents would ultimately result in an additional 2 hours of travel time.  I was frustrated.  Then I was thankful.  I was in a comfortable, safe car.  I had no critical timeline in which I needed to be somewhere.  I was not involved in any of the accidents.  Pause. Patience. Perspective.

A slow driver:  Honestly!  They were driving 10 MPH under the speed limit. What’s up with that?  I was tempted to do the ol’ flash the lights routine because I assumed it was some young whipper-snapper texting and not paying attention.  Nope, it was an elderly couple looking at a map and trying to find their way.  I would have felt horrible had I made their trek even more stressful by my impatience.  Pause. Patience. Perspective.

A broken Frappuccino machine:  I jumped off the freeway long enough to complete a coaching call with a very motivated client that I‘ve been working with for some time.  After the call, I decided to treat myself to a frappuccino for the next 90-minute drive home.  The sign said the frappuccino was 490 calories.  That’s a lot of calories for a drink in my mind, but I decided to treat myself.  Five minutes later the manager told me the machine was broken and he needed to refund my $5.62.  I could have been upset, but honestly, I was relieved.  I really didn’t feel good about it anyway.  Pause. Patience. Perspective.

So, what did all of this teach me?  The power of pausing, taking a second to engage with some patience, and thinking about a possible different perspective.

How would you benefit from practicing pause, patience, and perspective?

Cindy Jobs

www.organizetosimplify.com

 

 

National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice President
ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 website
Institute for Challenging Disorganization:
Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.
Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.
Coach Approach for Organizers
Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration
Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies

What are you meant to do?

Some NAPO (National Association of Professional Organizers) colleagues and I participated in a service project this weekend at the University District Food Bank.  My “job” was to work with the food bank’s amazing Director, helping him declutter and organize his office so it would be more inviting to his team and donors.  About an hour into the organizing process, he stopped, shook his head, and asked me “how in the world can you do this every day? I’m exhausted!”  My response: “because  it’s what I am meant to do.”  I wake up every morning looking forward to helping people get unstuck, physically or emotionally, and move forward in their lives.

How do you determine what you’re meant to do?

  1.  Start with a Values and Needs exercise.  It’s important to know, at your core, what makes you tick.  Using myself as an example, my top Values are honesty, loyalty, and affection.  Anyone that knows me well, knows I’m a hugger; deeply dedicated to my family, friends and clients; and don’t tolerate dishonesty.  So, I would not do well in an occupation that doesn’t afford me deep, meaningful personal contact.  My top Needs include family, peace, and self-worth.  Again, those close to me know I will drop everything if someone I’m close to needs me; I don’t do well with conflict; and knowing I’m providing a valuable service to my family, friends, and clients is what drives me.  (Note:  The link to the Values and Needs exercise is an example only.  I do not specifically endorse the authors or their works.)
  2. What are you good at?  Years ago I participated in Tom Roth’s StrengthsFinder exercise.  Not surprisingly, my identified strong traits markers include Stretegic, Discipline, Relator, Learner, and Responsibility.  All of these traits serve me well as a Professional Organizer and Coach.
  3. What are you NOT good at?  Knowing what you aren’t good at (or just don’t want to do) is as important as knowing what makes you tick.  Deep down, I’m a bit of an introvert.  Get to know me and I’m very open and communicative.  But, in a crowd of people I don’t know, I’m a wallflower.  Hence, I would not make a great salesperson.
  4. What are your skills? Some occupations just flat require some very defined skill sets.  Although I’m a kinesthetic learner, I don’t have fine dexterity skills.  I should not be a surgeon.  But I am really, really good at process, so people are constantly asking me to organize projects and events (and I love it!).
  5. What makes you smile when you think about doing it?  I don’t like to garden. It does not make me smile. I know people that do love to garden and when they think about going outside and getting their hands dirty, they beam!  On the other hand, I love to organize stuff and help people move from where they are (physically or emotionally) to where they want to be.  It makes me smile even thinking about it.  What makes you smile?

Are you frustrated or unhappy doing what you’re doing?  If so, maybe you’re not doing what you are meant to do.

Cindy Jobs

www.organizetosimplify.com

Member Color - Web
National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter Vice President
ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 website

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

Coach Approach for Organizers
Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration
Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies