Organize to Simplify

Click here to schedule a free coaching consultation.

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

International Coach Federation

Professional Resource Member

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD

Salma Hayek Pinault: “I’m very hard on myself . . . “

I recently listened to Oprah’s SuperSoul Conversations podcast with Salma Hayek Pinault. Although the podcast was titled “More to Say About Harvey Weinstein,” I found the podcast had next to nothing to do with Mr. Weinstein but more about kindness, not only for others but for ourselves.

During the conversation, Oprah asked a powerful question:

“What’s the lesson that’s taken you personally the longest to learn in your life?”

Ms. Hayek Pinault’s answer resonated deeply with me:

“I’m very hard on myself and not too long ago I realized I detect what I want to change, and then I disappoint myself if I don’t change it right away, you know. But it takes time for change. And I’ve noticed that if you really look, there are things that I don’t even remember that I was doing before and I didn’t like doing them because I’ve changed so profoundly that I don’t even remember I was like that anymore. And when I’m hard on my myself I have to remind myself that if I continue to believe in me and to be positive and to be kind to myself and to others, whether it will come, the changes that I want about myself, one day it will come. If you disappoint yourself, sometimes you give up.”

Although I believe myself to be a very kind individual, I found myself wanting to take a closer look at the connection between kindness and happiness and, boy, is there a connection!

According to a Huffington Post article, the benefits of kindness are significant.

1) We are happier.

Doing something for someone else, makes us feel good, both emotionally and biologically. The reference to “Helper’s High” comes from elevated levels of dopamine in the brain, resulting in a natural high.

Kindness = Happiness

2) We are healthier.

Acts of kindness result in elevated production of oxytocin. Oxytocin causes the release of nitric oxide which expands blood vessels, reducing blood pressure.

Kindness = Health

3) We age more slowly.

Back to oxytocin. Oxytocin reduces levels of free radicals and lowers inflammation, both significant factors in the aging process.

Kindness = Longer Life

4) We have stronger relationships.

We like people that show us, and themselves, kindness. Kindness creates bonds. Whether we are creating new bonds or strengthening existing bonds, kindness plays a key role.

Kindness = Stronger Relationships

5) We pass kindness on.

Kind people are inspirational. Think back to the last time you witnessed kindness, what was your next instinct? Passing it on, right? In 2014 a Starbucks customer paid for the drink of the drive-through customer behind her, resulting in a chain of 378 acts of “pay it forward” kindness. Kindness is contagious.

Kindness = More Kindness

Kindness. Can it be that simple? Can being kind to others and ourselves be the ticket to health and happiness Apparently so.

What’s your next kindness experiment?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here to schedule a free coaching consultation.

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

International Coach Federation

Professional Resource Member

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

What’s your gap?

When I start working with clients I ask them to describe two visions:

Where are you right now?
Where do you want to be?

With those two questions clearly understood, we can start the process of change that moves someone from where they are now, to where they want to be. In essence, closing the gap between their two visions.

What do I mean by “the gap?”

“Steve” wanted to get a job that better fit his strengths and ADHD diagnosis. His current job involved phone sales 8:00 AM – 5:00 PM with very little in-person contact and a lot of sitting. His vision of the perfect job involved travel, in-person communication and a high level of flexibility. “Steve” had a very clear vision, he knew where he wanted to be, but there was uncertainty about the process to get there.

“Kathy” wanted to take more control of her life. Her current routine was highly irregular and impulsive. She would go to bed and wake up “whenever,” with little direction for how her day unfolded. Most days she went to bed frustrated because she had little to show for her waking hours. “Kathy” wanted a more productive life she could feel good about. She wanted to go to bed by 11:00 PM, get up at 7:00 AM and have a robust, attainable schedule for her day. A very large gap from where “Kathy” was and where she wanted to be, but there was passion about getting there, one step at a time.

“Susie” wanted to have a home she could be proud, one to which she could invite friends and family to visit. Unfortunately, the current state of her home was very cluttered, disorganized and in some rooms, not physically safe. She continually brought additional items into the home without moving any items out. Her vision was of a home that reflected her many life experiences but was not so overwhelmed with clutter that she was in constant fear of tripping. This gap was physical, but closing that gap would open up a world of social interaction that hadn’t been experienced in a long time.

Each of these clients had a clear vision of where they were now and an even clearer vision of where they wanted to be. The disconnect was the gap.

Closing the gap is different for everyone, but it almost always involves a significant emotional component. And a lot of time, that component is fear.

Fear of being rejected in our job search so we settle for the status quo.

Fear of failure and sometimes even fear of success.

Fear that if we get our lives a little more in order even more will be expected of us.

Fear that if we let something physically go, the memories attached to it will go too.

Fear of the unknown.

What do you want to change? Where are you now? Where do you want to be? What’s your gap?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here to schedule a free coaching consultation.

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

Professional Resource Member

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

Taxes stressing you out?

“Yikes! I’m not even close to getting my taxes done and so stressed out about it!”

Not surprisingly, this time of year creates a lot of stress and anxiety for people . . . . especially for those that may have some procrastination, organization and motivation challenges.

Generally speaking, taxes are frustrating, confusing, and sometimes moderately depressing. Therefore, we tend to procrastinate when it comes to filing our taxes. According to Wolf Tax, there are five general reasons we procrastinate when it comes to filing our taxes:

Excuses: We can come up with lots of circumstances as to why we don’t do things, especially if the excuses are self-serving and other people around you are doing it too. “Groupthink” anyone?
Thrill-Seeking: Sometimes waiting until the last possible moment to do something gives us an emotional high. Generally, this is a short-lived payoff.
No obvious penalty: There’s no penalty for dropping them off at the post office at 11:59 PM on April 15. Why hurry?
Work better under pressure: Actually, people are less effective and more prone to make errors when working under pressure.
Perfectionism: Often referred to as “perfection paralysis.” We don’t want to start a project because we fear the outcome may not be “perfect.” Perfect stands in the way of progress.

Hopefully, you’ve already filed your taxes, received your refund, and none of what I’m presenting applies to you. If so, nicely done!

If you are still waiting to file your taxes, here are your next few steps:

Call For A Tax Appointment: Stop reading right now and call for an appointment with your tax preparer. If you don’t have one, now is a good time to do some research. There are, of course, a plethora of tax preparation options. You can do an internet search on “tax preparation services,” but now may be a great time to use that social network you’ve been building. Ask your friends and relatives if they have anyone to recommend. In addition, there may be some free tax preparation services available depending on your age and income. Search “free tax preparation services” and you will get a lot of
Gather Your Documents: By now you should have received all the documents required to prepare your taxes. These documents may include, but are not limited to:

W-2s from your employers,
1099-MISC forms for self-employment income,
1099-INT (interest) and 1099-DIV (dividends) forms,
1099-B forms showing brokerage trades in stocks and bonds,
K-1 forms for income from a partnership, small business, or trust,
1099-SSA form showing Social Security received,
Documentation of charitable donations.

Other great sources for documents you may need to prepare your taxes:
Tax Preparation Documents for Homeowners
Documents To Take To Your Accountant

Create A Reusable File System To Track And Maintain Tax Documents: Once you’ve gathered all your documents, create a simple filing system (it may only be two file folders or envelopes) that will allow you to repeat this process year-after-year (generally tax documentation requirements will be the same from year-to-year unless there are major life changes).

Envelope #1 Current Year Taxes: This envelope will contain a checklist of all the documents that were required to file the current years’ taxes, plus all backup documentation.

Envelope #2 Next Year Taxes: This envelope will contain the checklist of documents you need to gather for the next year’s tax cycle. Using this previously-created and tax preparer-approved form will make it easier to ensure you have all the documentation you need for simple tax preparation come year end.

I suggest using sturdy, plastic folders or envelopes for this purpose, that way you’re not replacing them every year. Plastic File Folders or Plastic Envelopes

Filing taxes isn’t always fun and rewarding, but the consequences of not filing (or not filing on time) can be expensive and stressful. Don’t procrastinate.

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here to schedule a free coaching consultation.

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

Professional Resource Member

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

“If only . . .” = Change

“He says he doesn’t care about being fashionable, if only he dressed more like Michael.”

“She is really good at her job, if only she wanted to stay home with the kids like my mom did.”

“I know life will be perfect if only I could only lose a few pounds.”

What we mean when we say “if only” is there is a need for change, in someone else or ourselves.

As part of my coaching practice, my clients focus a lot on change. Not only do people want to make changes in their own lives (which I fully support), but they want to make changes to other people too. Don’t get me wrong, most of us have things about ourselves we’d like to change and I support that 100%. But what does it say about us that we feel the need to change others?

Let’s take each of the above statements just a little further:

“He says he doesn’t care about being fashionable, if only he dressed more like Michael.”

He didn’t care about fashion when you met him, why should he care about that now? Why should you? What changed? Why bring someone else into your relationship? What kind of pressure are you putting on Michael to maintain your level of perfection?

“She is really good at her job, if only she wanted to stay home with the kids like my mom did.”

My guess is that one of the things that attracted you to her was the drive and determination she had for her job. What changed? How much is her job a part of her? What happens when you ask her to give up something that’s important to her? Are your needs more important than hers?

“I know life will be perfect if only I could only lose a few pounds.”

Comments like these hurt me to the core. I struggled with self-image issues when I was younger (actually, still do) and I was certain that my life would be perfect if only I lost 25 pounds. Then I lost 25 pounds and low-and-behold, life was not perfect. What I found was that the people who truly loved and cared about me thought I was perfect just the way I was. They didn’t see a need for change, why did I?

How much happier would we be if we could eliminate “if only” from our lives and look at others, and ourselves, as perfect just the way we are?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here to schedule a free coaching consultation.

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

Professional Resource Member

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

ADHD in the Workplace

October is ADHD Awareness Month

“For many people, ADD is not a disorder but a trait, a way of being in the world. When it impairs their lives, then it becomes a disorder.” — Edward Hallowell

There have been some incredibly successful people who have ADHD. Most have identified their ADHD-created weaknesses and designed support structures to reduce the impact in the workplace. For them, it is a trait, not a disorder.

Others, however, struggle with a variety of challenges created by the symptoms of ADHD.

Most workplaces are designed around the 92%-96% of us that are linear, process-oriented people who understand prioritization and are keen to basic social norms. People with ADHD find some of these basic premises a challenge.

Listed below are some of the most common barriers those struggling with ADHD find in a typical workplace:

Organization, prioritization, and sequencing: Some of the most difficult tasks for people with ADHD to get a handle are organization, prioritization and sequencing. The inability to find important documents, turn projects in on time and have a clear picture of what needs to happen when can create incredible stress.

Solution: If you don’t have an assistant to help out, possibly enlist the services of an organized co-worker or Professional Organizer who can help set up simple filing systems, create a calendar system utilizing some project management tools (due date, tasks, timelines, calendar reminders, etc.), and schedule regular check-ins to ensure you are on track.

Time management: This is, by far, the most common hurdle for the clients I work with who have ADHD. Due to their executive functioning processes, they just have a harder time keeping track of time. This presents a real problem when they continually show up late for meetings (or don’t show up at all) or when they estimate that a project will take an hour and it ends up taking much longer, frustrating not only themselves but whomever else is involved in the project.

Solution: First, I encourage all of my clients to purchase a Time Timer to track not only the time it takes to complete a task (vs the time they think it will take), but it also helps to be aware of the passage of time. Second, I promote the use of analog clocks everywhere and wearing an analog watch. It is very helpful to regularly be reminded of time and digital devices just don’t have the same impact. Lastly, use an audible or vibration device to que that it’s time for a transition (going to a meeting, picking up the kids, returning from lunch, etc.).

Challenging social skills: Individuals with ADHD are more reactionary than those without. Unfortunately, this may result in unintentionally offending those around them by not listening or interrupting, being more direct than the social setting may call for, and being more “me” focused than is appropriate.

Solution: Practice being attentive, with special attention to blocking out distractions. Pause before speaking. Ask yourself if the reaction is truly warranted. Pay close attention to social cues. Did someone walk away abruptly? Possibly you offended without meaning to do so. Reach out if it appears someone has been offended. Asking for feedback and forgiveness is hard at the moment, but much better than allowing the ill will to linger.

Distractibility: Let’s face it, people with ADHD are more easily distracted than others. Whether it’s an external distraction (music, co-workers, jack-hammers, piles of paper, or a cluttered desk) or internal distractions (daydreaming, planning an anniversary dinner, wondering how the fantasy football team is doing) distractions are all around us.

Solution: If possible, visually or audibly block out distractions. This may include headphones and closing a door or blinds. Don’t constantly be checking e-mail (I suggest my clients only look at e-mail three to four times a day if the office policies and norms allow). Stay away from social media when a project deadline is looming. Keep track of projects and tasks by using task lists and a Time Timer.

Do you see yourself or others in the above situations? If so, is ADHD a trait or a disorder?

Cindy Jobs

National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice President

Institute for Challenging Disorganization:

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

Coach Approach for Organizers

Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration

Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies

What do you know about ADHD?

“It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.” — Malcolm Forbes

October is National ADHD Awareness month. Over the next month, I will share some of my experience and understanding of the challenges of living with ADHD.

The first being that ADHD is one of the most highly understood brain-based conditions. As an organizer and coach who primarily works with people struggling with ADHD, I can tell you the struggle is real.

It is estimated that 4% – 8% of the population has ADHD the traits may cause frustration for not only people diagnosed with ADHD but their family, friends, co-workers, etc.

Comments I frequently hear from my clients:

“People think I just don’t care.”

“I’ve been shamed my whole life.”

“People think I’m ignoring them.”

“They tell me to just try harder. I’m really trying.”

“I don’t want to be late, I just can’t seem to get out of the house on time.”

“I have horrible credit because I forget to pay my bills.”

What is ADHD?

“A complex syndrome of developmental impairments of executive functions, the self-management system of the brain, a system of mostly unconscious operations. These impairments are situationally-specific, chronic, and significantly interfere with functioning in many aspects of the person’s daily life.” (Thomas E. Brown, Ph.D.)

The “big 3” ADHD Traits.

Inattention
Hyperactivity
Impulsivity

ADHD is highly genetic.

Only height has a stronger genetic predictability (Source: University of Maryland psychologist Andrea Chronis). Think about that. If your child is struggling with what appears to be ADHD, could that explain some of your frustrations as a child or adult? I frequently work with women who were diagnosed with ADHD after their children were diagnosed.

Why is ADHD a problem?

ADHD affects the executive function area of the brain (prefrontal cortex) that controls working memory, sequencing, flexibility, information processing, time management, and emotional regulation. Most of our world is designed to work in concert with people that have an ability to think in a linear, process-oriented way.

How is it different? Here’s an example.

Most people can visit a Staples and pick out the perfect pen because they can process the pros/cons of each type, color, thickness, etc. Someone with ADHD may get completely stuck by the sheer number of options. They literally may not be able to mentally process all the options and make a decision, so they leave the store empty-handed, frustrated and feeling like a failure.

What can someone with ADHD do to make life easier?

-Clocks, clocks, and more clocks. Put them everywhere and make them analog. 10:10 looks very similar to 10:40 on a digital clock, but very different on an analog clock.
-Thought management. Write things down wherever you would look to (multiple places if that makes sense)
-Time management: Routinely use a planner and a timing device (phone alerts work wonders as does a Time Timer).
-Get organized enough (less stuff, less to think about)
-Embrace a “to do” list (keep it simple and current)
-Voice/text messages (if something is important to remember and you can’t write it down, leave yourself and/or others messages)

There will be more information to come throughout the month about how ADHD affects our lives. If you have questions, feel free to contact me at 206-707-3458.

Cindy Jobs

National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice President

Institute for Challenging Disorganization:

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

Coach Approach for Organizers

Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration

Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies

Boundaries: How are they working for you?

One of the most powerful things we can do for ourselves is set our own boundaries.

So, why are boundaries so powerful?

Boundaries can be high or low (“Never call before 7:00 AM” or “Try not to call too early or too late.”)
We can set, break, or remove our own boundaries depending on the circumstance.
Boundaries can be based on many factors: laws, ethical codes, personal morals, ethical beliefs, advice from others, our own personal needs, etc.
Boundaries, once established, can guide us to comfortable personal behavior.

As an example, a few of my boundaries are:

Personal safety: I do not knowingly or willingly put myself or anyone close to me in danger. What might that mean?

Unless I know someone well, I don’t allow them in my home or car.
I generally don’t go out at night by myself in unfamiliar areas.
I keep doors locked.

Working hours and conditions: I make every effort not to work nights and weekends because I don’t want to take time away from family and friends. I also won’t take clients that are outside of a comfortable commuting distance.

Organizing Clients: Several of my clients struggle with ADHD, OCD, bi-polar, etc. If they are not committed to understanding their challenges and working with medical and mental health professionals, they will not be committed to the organizing process, so I won’t work with them.

Coaching Clients: I take coaching very seriously. If a client does not commit to the personal effort involved with coaching (engage in self-work and reflection between sessions, they agree not to play the blame game, they come to coaching sessions prepared and on time, etc.) they will not be successful with the coaching process, so I won’t work with them.

Communicating boundaries: One of the keys to successful boundaries is clearly communicating what those boundaries are. Whether it’s verbal or written, clearly expressing your boundary will help people manage themselves to your expectations. If clearly communicated, it is much easier to address issues when boundary violations occur.

Renegotiating your own boundaries: One of the beautiful thing about boundaries is that we can renegotiate, or ignore them entirely, based on any particular circumstance. For example:

I coached a client late in the evening before a difficult family discussion. She was nervous and wanted the family meeting to go well and it was important to me that I gave her the support she needed (working hours boundary broken). She’d never asked for this special accommodation before, so I didn’t feel taken advantage of.
On my way home the other night, I spotted a woman walking alongside a major thoroughfare holding what looked like a little dog (I’m a dog person, so that caught my eye). It was dark, rainy, and I’d been away from the house for nearly 12 hours. I just wanted to get home. But I couldn’t let it go, so I turned around. She’d run out of gas and was walking (with her little dog) the 2 miles to the gas station. So, by myself at night (first broken boundary) I stopped and invited this woman and her dog into my car (second broken boundary). All ended well, but major boundary infractions happened that night!

What boundaries do you have? What boundaries need to be set or communicated? How could you benefit from clearly defining your boundaries?

Cindy Jobs

National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter President

Certified Premium Subscriber, Institute for Challenging Disorganization

Coach Approach for Organizers

ADHD: What is it? How to work with it.

October is National ADHD Awareness month. I recently gave an hour and a half presentation at the Everett Library about ADHD. The highlights are noted below

“It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.” — Malcolm Forbes

What is ADHD?

“A complex syndrome of developmental impairments of executive functions, the self-management system of the brain, a system of mostly unconscious operations.” (Dr. Thomas Brown).

It is neurological, not a matter of willpower.

How many people have it?

During their lifetimes, 12.9% of men will be diagnosed with the attention disorder. Just 4.9% of women will be diagnosed. Today, about 4% of American adults over the age of 18 deal with ADHD on a daily basis. (healthline.com)

It is highly genetic. Only height has a stronger genetic predictability.
(University of Maryland psychologist Andrea Chronis)

What are some of the traits of ADHD?

The Big three: Inattention. Hyperactivity. Impulsivity

But wait there’s more: Organizationally challenged; Chronically late; Trouble prioritizing; Challenged socially; Poor listening skills; Addictive personality (shopping, substance abuse, etc.); and lots, lots more.

Will medication help?

Medication helps 70%-80% of the time. According to drugs.com, as of October 2nd, there were 48 ADHD medications listed. Success is a joint effort between therapists, MDs and the client to get the correct medication in the correct dose to help maintain focus.

What can be done to manage ADHD?

Work collaboratively with physicians, therapists, family/friends, coaches, professional organizers, etc.

Helpful processes:

-Thought management: write things down where you can find them
-Time management: routinely use a planner and a timing device (timetimer.com)
-Get organized: less stuff, less to think about
-Embrace a “to do” list: keep it simple and current
-Voice recordings: leave yourself or others messages if you can’t write it down
-Clocks, clocks, and more clocks

How do I know if I have it?

There are several on-line tests that may provide some clarity; however, a true diagnosis should be done with a trained medical/mental health provider.

How can I learn more about it?

CHADD.org (Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder)

add.org

additudemag.com

My favorite books are by:
Ari Tuckman, PsyD; Thomas Brown, PhD; Sari Solden, MS, LMFT; Edward Hallowell, M.D.; John Ratey, M.D.; Daniel G. Amen, M.D.; Judith Kolberg

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me. I am not a doctor or mental health provider; however, the majority of my organizing and coaching clients have ADHD and I’ve spent years researching the condition to ensure their success.