Tag Archives: relationships

Slow the heck down!

I’m at my mom’s celebrating her 89th birthday.  As usual, when I visit, there’s a list of things she (I) would like to accomplish.

Here’s this trip’s list:

  1. Organize photos.
  2. Install screen to hide the garage work area.
  3. Install pull-out organizers in bathroom cabinets.
  4. Get bedspread dry-cleaned.
  5. Do a little de-cluttering.
  6. Coordinate celebratory dinner.
  7. Relax and have fun (Mom’s list, not mine).

Honestly, #7 was not even on my radar, but it seems to get moved to the top of the list almost every trip.

The following things were not on the list but happened anyway:

  1. Leisurely coffee, muffins, and chit chat every morning.
  2. Dinner at my brother and sister-in-law’s house.
  3. Two ceremoniously long lunches with my mom and sister.
  4. A casual get-together with an amazing high-school buddy.
  5. Lunch with my mom, sister, and nephew.

Although we did get a lot of our tasks completed, there were so much more I wanted to “accomplish.”  But, really, didn’t we accomplish the important stuff?

In a year, what will my mom remember about her birthday week?  I think she will remember that we strengthened the family bonds beyond what even those family photos show.

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

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Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD

 

 

Balance: Self Value vs Stuff Value

Balance is a tricky thing.  Too much of one thing tips the scales in the other direction and we get totally out of balance.

But balance is not just about stuff vs space (although stuff vs space is a huge issue for a lot of people).  For some interesting information on how much stuff Americans have, here are some statistics from a recent CBS Morning show.

There are 50,000 self-storage facilities in the U.S., more than Dunkin’ Donuts (8,500), Subways (28,000) or McDonald’s (14,027) combined.*

And that’s just for the stuff we CAN’T fit inside our homes, where there’s more “stuff” piled in closets, bedrooms, garages and basements.

The CBS segment speaks to the stuff vs space conundrum with an interesting question: why do we park $10,000 cars outside when we fill our garages with stuff of largely no value?

Nearly all my clients struggle with the self value vs stuff value balancing act.

A client spoke to a situation at their home.  His comment to me: “my wife asked me a while ago to clear out the garage so she could park in it.”  When I inquired what “a while ago” meant he admitted it had been 18 months.  It was clear he was prioritizing the stuff value in his garage above the his wife’s self value (her request to be able to park in the garage). The prioritization realization created a perspective shift.

Another client comments regularly about how her closet (stuff) drives her crazy (self).  It is packed.  She could easily get by with half of the items in her closet and still be considered one of the best-dressed women I know.  If she eliminated half the stuff she would feel the benefit of open space, organization and clarity (self value).  For years she’s been prioritizing her stuff over herself.

And then there is the client who tries to cram too many commitments (stuff value) into his schedule resulting in limiting his time with family and friends (self value).

What’s your balance of self value vs stuff value?

* Note:  This is a direct lift from the CBS segment.  No, the math doesn’t work, but it’s close.  🙂

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here for 15-minute organizing tips.

 

 

 

www.organizetosimplify.com

 

 

 

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

 

 

 

International Coach Federation

 

 

 

 

Professional Resource Member

 

 

 

Coach Approach for Organizers

 

 

 

 

Institute for Challenging Disorganization

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD

Salma Hayek Pinault: “I’m very hard on myself . . . “

I recently listened to Oprah’s SuperSoul Conversations podcast with Salma Hayek Pinault.  Although the podcast was titled “More to Say About Harvey Weinstein,” I found the podcast had next to nothing to do with Mr. Weinstein but more about kindness, not only for others but for ourselves.

During the conversation, Oprah asked a powerful question:

“What’s the lesson that’s taken you personally the longest to learn in your life?”

Ms. Hayek Pinault’s answer resonated deeply with me:

“I’m very hard on myself and not too long ago I realized I detect what I want to change, and then I disappoint myself if I don’t change it right away, you know.  But it takes time for change. And I’ve noticed that if you really look, there are things that I don’t even remember that I was doing before and I didn’t like doing them because I’ve changed so profoundly that I don’t even remember I was like that anymore. And when I’m hard on my myself I have to remind myself that if I continue to believe in me and to be positive and to be kind to myself and to others, whether it will come, the changes that I want about myself, one day it will come.  If you disappoint yourself, sometimes you give up.”

Although I believe myself to be a very kind individual, I found myself wanting to take a closer look at the connection between kindness and happiness and, boy, is there a connection!

According to a Huffington Post article, the benefits of kindness are significant.

1) We are happier.

Doing something for someone else, makes us feel good, both emotionally and biologically. The reference to “Helper’s High” comes from elevated levels of dopamine in the brain, resulting in a natural high.

Kindness = Happiness

2) We are healthier.

Acts of kindness result in elevated production of oxytocin.  Oxytocin causes the release of nitric oxide which expands blood vessels, reducing blood pressure.

Kindness = Health

3) We age more slowly.

Back to oxytocin.  Oxytocin reduces levels of free radicals and lowers inflammation, both significant factors in the aging process.

Kindness = Longer Life

4) We have stronger relationships.

We like people that show us, and themselves, kindness.  Kindness creates bonds. Whether we are creating new bonds or strengthening existing bonds, kindness plays a key role.

Kindness = Stronger Relationships

5) We pass kindness on.

Kind people are inspirational. Think back to the last time you witnessed kindness, what was your next instinct?  Passing it on, right?  In 2014  a Starbucks customer paid for the drink of the drive-through customer behind her, resulting in a chain of 378 acts of “pay it forward” kindness.  Kindness is contagious.

Kindness = More Kindness

Kindness.  Can it be that simple?  Can being kind to others and ourselves be the ticket to health and happiness  Apparently so.

What’s your next kindness experiment?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here for 15-minute organizing tips.

 

 

 

 

www.organizetosimplify.com

 

 

 

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

 

 

 

International Coach Federation

 

 

 

 

Professional Resource Member

 

 

 

Coach Approach for Organizers

 

 

 

 

Institute for Challenging Disorganization

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

 

Simplify your life!

This is “National Simplify Your Life” week.

Because it’s part of my business name (Organize to Simplify) I’m constantly thinking about what “simplify” means to me, my friends, my family, and my clients.

Here are some things that may need to be simplified in our lives:

  • Stuff?  Yes!
  • Schedules?  Yes!
  • Technology? Yes!
  • People?  Yes!  (yikes!)

Stuff:

Most of us have way more stuff than we need (and probably even want).  Look around the room you are sitting in and really take a hard look at everything that surrounds you.  Do you use them?  Do they bring you joy and happiness?  If not, what would it feel like to let them go?  How would it feel knowing that they were in the home of someone that actually needed and wanted them? Not only is it okay to let things go, de-cluttering makes us healthier:

According to the Chicago Tribune: “Getting rid of clutter can have unexpected health benefits. Letting go of material things gives a feeling of euphoria some liken to the runner’s high. It’s liberating and frees up time and space for healthy habits, such as exercising. It can even reduce allergy symptoms and help you lose weight.”

Schedules:

Raise your hand if you feel you have too much to do and not enough time (I can almost see all of your hands raised right now).  Do you need to do everything on your schedule?   Are there things you knew at the time you should have said “no, but thanks for asking” to?  Are you doing things that don’t make you happy and are not critical (book club you no longer enjoy, exercise class you are only attending because you already paid for it but don’t really like, networking meetings that don’t bring you joy or clients, etc.)  Much like our stuff, cluttered and over-crowded schedules can affect our health.  I encourage you to take a look at your schedule and see what you can eliminate.  What would you do with that extra time?  Exercise?  Sleep? Spend more time with family and friends?

Technology:

Am I actually suggesting you give up technology?  Absolutely not!!! What I am suggesting is taking a critical look at how much time you are devoting to it.  Personally, I don’t do Twitter, Instagram, or Tumblr,  but I spend way too much time on Facebook.  What are you learning from all these connections?  Is it really a “connection” or just a way to spend time?  What would happen if you disconnected from a social media platform or two?  What would happen if you reduced the amount of time you spent on them?  What would you do with that time?  Remember, doing nothing is a perfectly acceptable answer to that question.

People:

This one may sound harsh, but it’s worth thinking about.  I could never do without connections to people.  I love being around people; being with people fills me with joy.  But, are there connections I am spending time maintaining that no longer serve me (or the other person) the way they used to?  Think about it.  Is the time spent maintaining a relationship disproportionate to the joy the relationship brings you?

Some people come into your life just to teach you how to let go.”   Search Quotes

I’m pretty sure we are all aware of things that could be eliminated from our lives, but it’s so hard to take that first step.  So, I’m going to challenge you:

Over the next week:

  • Eliminate one item of clutter.
  • Cancel one unnecessary appointment.
  • Reduce time spent on technology by one hour.
  • Take a critical look at one relationship.

Simplify your life . . . one small step at a time.

Cindy Jobs

www.organizetosimplify.com

Member Color - Web
National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter Vice President
ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 website
Institute for Challenging Disorganization:
Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.
Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.
Coach Approach for Organizers
Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration
Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies

How can you simplify your life?

simplifyLast week was “National Simplify Your Life” week.  I meant to write a post last week about this subject, but I took a week off and REALLY simplified my life by not doing any work.  How’s that for “simplifying?”  Not very productive, but it felt really good!

Although I didn’t write the post, I thought about what simplifying my life would look like.  What do I have to simplify?

  • Stuff?  Yes!
  • Schedules?  Yes!
  • Technology? Yes!
  • People?  Yes!  (yikes!)

Stuff:

Most of us have way more stuff than we actually need, and probably want.  Look around the room you are sitting in and really take a hard look at all the items that are in the room.  Do you use them?  Do they bring you joy and happiness?  If not, what would it feel like to let them go?  How would it feel knowing that they were in the home of someone that actually needed and wanted them? Not only is it okay to let things go, de-cluttering makes us healthier:

According to the Chicago Tribune: “Getting rid of clutter can have unexpected health benefits. Letting go of material things gives a feeling of euphoria some liken to the runner’s high. It’s liberating and frees up time and space for healthy habits, such as exercising. It can even reduce allergy symptoms and help you lose weight.”

Schedules:

Raise your hand if you feel you have too much to do and not enough time (I see lots of hands raised right now).  Do you need to do everything on your schedule?   Are there things you knew at the time you should have said “no, but thanks for asking” to?  Are you doing things that don’t make you happy and are not critical (book club you no longer enjoy, exercise class you are only attending because you already paid for it but don’t really like, networking meetings that don’t bring you joy or clients, etc.)  Much like our stuff, cluttered and over-crowded schedules can affect our health.  I encourage you to take a look at your schedule and see what you can eliminate.  What would you do with that extra time?  Exercise?  Sleep? Spend more time with family and friends?

Technology:

Am I actually suggesting you give up technology?  Absolutely not!!! What I am suggesting is taking a critical look at how much time you are devoting to it.  Personally, I don’t do Twitter, Instagram, or Snapchat, but I spend way too much time on Facebook.  What are you learning from all these connections?  Is it really a “connection” or just a way to spend time?  What would happen if you disconnected from a social media platform or two?  What would happen if you reduced the amount of time you spent on them.  What would you do with that time?  Remember, doing nothing is a perfectly acceptable answer to that question.

People:

This one threw me for a minute, but it’s worth thinking about.  I could never do without connections to people.  I love being around people; being with people fills me with joy.  But, are there connections I am spending time maintaining that no longer serve me (or the other person) the way they used to?  Think about it.  Is the time spent maintaining some relationships disproportionate to the the joy the relationship brings you?

“Not every person you meet is here to stay.  Some people come in your life only to teach you something.”  Anurag Prakash Ray

I’m pretty sure we are all aware of things that could be eliminated from our lives, but it’s so hard to take that first step.  So, I’m going to challenge you:

Over the next week:

  • Eliminate one item of clutter.
  • Cancel one unnecessary appointment.
  • Reduce time spend on technology by one hour.
  • Take a critical look at one relationship.

Simplify your life . . . one small step at a time.

 

Organize to Simplify CMYK

 

www.organizetosimplify.com

cindy@organizetosimplify.com

206-707-3458

National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Area Chapter President

seattle

 

 

 

Institute for Challenging Disorganization, Six Certificates of Education

The Real Costs of Procrastination: Installment #2

Procrastination Your Cards Image

Procrastination is a tricky thing.  Frankly, I procrastinated writing this post for 6 days.  When I was working on The Real Costs of Procrastination: Installment #1 I thought “I’ll just dive right into Installment #2.”  Did I?  No.  Why?  Because I had a whole week to do it.  Now, here I am at the 11th hour trying to get in done in time for the deadline.

What was the cost to me of that decision?  Significant stress.

Last week I published The Real Costs of Procrastination: Installment #1 that dealt with the tangible and intangible costs of procrastinating on Relationships, Health, Household Chores, Home/Car Repairs, and Organization (my personal favorite).  Installment #2 will tackle Wills, Financial Planning, Taxes, Business Costs, and Insurance.

Wills:  Not that any of us want to think about it, but at some point, our earthly possessions will need to be passed on to someone else.  It’s true, as cool as our stuff is,  we can’t take it with us.  Wouldn’t it be fantastic if we had some say in where our cool stuff went?  Well, that’s what wills are for.  A 2008 study found that 58%  of Americans did not have a will.  That number doesn’t surprise me at all.  It should, but it doesn’t.  None of us want to think about death and dying, but it is irresponsible to our loved ones not to take care of this important process.  When someone passes without a will, the state gets to decide what happens to your stuff.  In most situations it could be pretty straight forward:  the inheritance goes to the spouse, the kids, etc.  But what about our businesses?  What about our stepchildren or non-marital significant other?  What if we didn’t want everything divided equally?  What if we wanted all our money and possessions to go to a favorite charity?  Without a valid will, none of these situations would probably be resolved to our desired expectation.  Cost of procrastination: Money, Relationships.

(Phew, glad to have that one out of the way.)

Financial Planning:  Detailed and thorough financial planning is critical to our long-term well being.    When we are in our twenties and thirties, we can’t see past a new pair of jeans to even think about planning for our retirement.  Those days just seem too far away. It is never too early to start planning for our retirement; but lots of times it can be too late.  What’s the benefit of starting early?   Using the compound interest calculator, I wanted to see how much a relatively small investment could grow over time.  I started with $1,000 and estimated that I’d put in an additional $50 per month (about 10 lattes with a generous tip), and calculated the growth over 10 years at a 5% interest rate.  What would I have at the end of that time period?  $9,175.63.  Change it to 20 years and the number becomes a staggering $22,492.87.  Amazing what a little planning and discipline could do for our long-term financial well being.  Cost of procrastination: Limited Retirement Savings, Reduced Retirement Enjoyment.

Taxes:  According to a CBS News post, the cost of waiting until the last minute to file income taxes costs on average an additional  $400.  It’s not that we can just choose to not pay our taxes by April 15.  (Well, some folks may, but I’m guessing the cost of that decision is much greater than $400.)   We are just delaying the inevitable.   If we thought we were getting money back on our taxes, we’d be Johnny-On-The-Spot when it came to filing our taxes, right?  Not necessarily. Procrastinators are procrastinators, and whether we think we are getting money back or having to give Uncle Sam money, we generally wait until the last minute to do it anyway.  In addition the the extra $400, the stress of not knowing takes a tremendous toll.   Cost of procrastination:  Money, stress.

Business Costs:  A 2012 CNBC post identified the cost of procrastination in business as being a staggering $10,396 . . . . per employee . . . per year.  Wow!  The article referred to procrastination as “the most invisible cost in business today.”  I don’t doubt it.  When I worked in Corporate America,  I surely procrastinated a bit on projects that I knew needed to get done, but I just didn’t feel motivated to do.  Mostly the procrastinated projects had open-ended completion dates, but they were necessary, and the benefit to the company had I completed them in a timely manner would have been significant.  Why did I procrastinate?  Generally, I felt I didn’t know enough about the project to get started; didn’t feel I had the appropriate resources to get the project completed; or just found other stuff that was more fun to do.  Cost of procrastination:  Money, Credibility, Possible Promotion

Insurance:  I just updated my business insurance a few months ago.  Before I renewed in 2013 I committed to shopping my insurance needs around a bit.  Well, I procrastinated that project and didn’t do it, letting my carrier renew me for the next 12 months without a second thought.  This year I received five proposals covering my current business insurance needs.  The result?  A 40% reduction in cost for the same coverage.  It sickens me to think of what I might have been able to do with that money had I gone through the process in 2013.   I should have taken the time to ensure that my coverage was complete and the best value available.   The same goes for renewing any kind of insurance:  auto, home, personal liability, health, etc.  I worked with a client several years ago that hadn’t done a detailed review of their business auto insurance in several years.  After my analysis of their coverage, it was determined that two of their vehicles hadn’t been included in the policy.  Can you image the cost had there been an accident with one of those vehicles?   Frightening.   Cost of procrastination:  Money, Peace of Mind, Liability

Well, that concludes my top 10 list of areas where we shouldn’t procrastinate and the costs if we do.  I hope some of them resonate with you, as they did with me as I was preparing to write about them.   We all have so much to do that sometimes things just have to be put aside for a while.  And that’s okay.  As long as “a while” doesn’t turn into “forever” and we cost ourselves and our loved ones undue financial hardship and stress.

“Procrastination is the practice of carrying out less urgent tasks in preference to more urgent ones, or doing more pleasurable things in place of less pleasurable ones, and thus putting off impending tasks to a later time, sometimes to the “last minute” before the deadline. (Wikipedia)”

Cindy Jobs

Organize to Simplify RGB www.organizetosimplify.com

Member Color - WebNational Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter President
 ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 websiteCertified Premium Subscriber, Institute for Challenging Disorganization