Monthly Archives: May 2018

“I’m curious . . . . “

Synergy happens when opposite perspectives are explored.

It is human nature to come at any situation with our own personal history and bias.  It’s difficult to be understanding and empathic with someone else’s perspective if we haven’t experienced their experiences.

When I was a Director at Macy’s, I supervised several people many years my junior.  I will readily admit that my perspective at the time was that I knew best.  My expectation was for them to follow my lead and do things they way they’d always been done, my way.  Fortunately I managed brilliant people that would frequently push back with suggestions to do things in another (generally more efficient) way.  However, that meant that I had to open my mind to being curious about their perspective.

I’d like to say this was an easy transition, but it was not.  However, the more I exercised the curiousity muscle, the better we became as a team.

“I’d like to telecommute.”

Oh my gosh, this was one of the hardest hurdles for me to jump over.  I was their manager, how in the world could I “manage” them when they weren’t in the office?  Would they take advantage of the freedom?  Would they be doing laundry when they should be working on spreadsheets?  How could we effectively work as a team when the team wasn’t together?  All valid concerns because I’d not experienced the telecommuting enviroment.  So, I excercised my curiousity muscle and asked my team to “educate me” on how they thought telecommuting  would work.  What parameters were they envisioning (every day? once a week? whenever convenient?).  I asked them to create the boundaries and accountability.  It worked so well, I started telecommuting once a week also.  Win. Win.

“The information on this report is no longer relevant.”

“No, I’m sure someone would have told us if it wasn’t necessary” was what I wanted to say.  But exercising the curiosity muscle necessitated me being open to another point of view.  “What’s driving you to believe it’s irrelevant?”  “How can we find out if it is relevant to the other stakeholders?” “Is there something else more relevant to the success of our team?”

“The training we are providing isn’t working.”

Argh! Managing a training program is difficult and expensive and I really didn’t want to start from scratch, but the curiousity muscle was already being engaged.  “What makes you think it’s broken?”  Well, they were curious themselves and asked questions.  Lots and lots of questions.  “What’s your vision of the new program?”  The suggested replacement program was a well thought-out curriculum.  “How will we know if it’s working.”   A new report was suggested that included data points that I didn’t even know existed.

Exercising my curiousity muscle didn’t mean that I accepted every thought or suggestion that came my way.  But, by openly listening without judgement to a different perspective showed that I truly valued the team member and their contribution to the team as a whole.

How can you show your co-worker, friend or family member that you sincerely value their perspective?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here for 15-minute organizing tips.

 

 

 

 

www.organizetosimplify.com

 

 

 

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

 

 

 

International Coach Federation

 

 

 

 

Professional Resource Member

 

 

 

Coach Approach for Organizers

 

 

 

 

Institute for Challenging Disorganization

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD

 

Are you working with boulders or pebbles?

Things can be so dog-gone overwhelming sometimes, can’t they?

I worked with a couple clients last week that were paralyzed by their “to do” lists.  The lists were so long and the projects were so daunting that the default action was inaction.

They were trying to work with boulders when it would have been much easier to work with pebbles.

What does working with boulders vs pebbles mean?  I’ll use one of my projects as an example.

I realized that my current business name doesn’t speak to a large segment of my business: coaching.  If you were looking for a coach would you think it made sense to contact “Organize to Simplify?”  I know I wouldn’t, so I’m changing my business name which triggers a plethora of tasks.  Some of these are Boulder tasks, some are pebble tasks.

Change business name and identity:  Boulder task

  • Secure new domain: Pebble task
  • Create new logo: Boulder task
  • Create a new website: Boulder task
  • Outreach to clients and support base: Boulder task

Secure new domain: Pebble task (done)

Create new logo: Boulder task

  • Hire designer: Pebble task (done)
  • Engage with friends, family, and colleagues for their input on initial designs: Pebble task (done)
  • Submit preference to the designer: Pebble ask
  • Review 2nd round submissions, review updates with the designer: Pebble task
  • Review 3rd round submissions, review updates with the designer: Pebble task

Create a new website: Boulder task

  • Decide on new website platform: Boulder task (done)
    • Review website options and costs: Pebble task (done)
    • Review website templates: Pebble task (done)
  • Determine if the website will be self-created or hire sub-contractor: Boulder task
    • Determine if I can do it myself: Pebble task
    • Determine if I can justify sub-contractor cost: Pebble task
    • Determine timeline availability of sub-contractor matches desired deliverable: Pebble task
  • Create website sitemap: Pebble task
  • Rewrite website pages: Pebble task
  • Choose images for the website: Pebble task

Market new company: Boulder task

  • Create marketing plan: Boulder task
    • Determine marketing target: Pebble task
    • Determine marketing vehicles: Pebble task
  • Order new business cards and note cards: Pebble task
  • Write a letter of introduction to clients and support base:  Pebble task
  • Solicit LinkedIn endorsements: Pebble task
  • Solicit Google My Business endorsements: Pebble task

I fid this to be a pretty daunting, and I’m certain incomplete, list.

The task of “Change business name and identity” is a boulder task.  I would never have been able to pick that boulder up all at one time. The boulder task was too big.  I needed to create many pebbles out of that boulder in order to be successful.

What boulder tasks are you avoiding because they are too daunting?

What could you get done if you broke that boulder into pebbles?

 

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here for 15-minute organizing tips.

 

 

 

 

www.organizetosimplify.com

 

 

 

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

 

 

 

International Coach Federation

 

 

 

 

Professional Resource Member

 

 

 

Coach Approach for Organizers

 

 

 

 

Institute for Challenging Disorganization

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD

 

 

Are you listening?

Yesterday was a day full of observation and personal enlightenment.

I listened to an Oprah SuperSoul podcast with Thich Nhat Hanh, a Buddhist monk, author and Nobel Peace Prize nominee.    Although the entire podcast was extremely interesting, at 23 minutes in, the term “compassionate listening” comes up.  This was a new phrase to me, so it piqued my interest.

Thich Nhat Hanh revealed his communication mantras to support compassionate listening.

“I’m here for you.”  The most precious thing you can offer is your presence.

“I know you are there.”  Recognizing other’s presence reinforces your commitment to the communication process.

“I know you suffer.”  Acknowledgment of suffering or hurting reinforces listening.

“I suffer.  Please help me.”  Letting others know you are suffering will help reduce our own suffering and is an open request for compassion.

Although the mantras aren’t phrases I would say out loud, the concepts intrigued me so I decided to do an experiment on my own compassionate listening.

“I’m here for you.”

I talk to my 86-year old mother nearly every night.  The conversations are very similar so I find myself doing dishes, folding clothes, or checking my e-mail.  I’m certainly not listening with compassion.  Am I even hearing what she’s saying?  Am I here for her?

“I know you are there.”

I pick up my grandkids on Monday afternoons.  I love my time with them, but sometimes find myself reaching for the radio dial to catch up on the latest news.  What might I be missing if I don’t leave the space open for my 4-1/2-year-old grandson to engage with me about how many school busses we see on the way home? Do I show that I know they are there?

“I know you suffer.”

A friend called with a frustrating family situation.  Although I could sense the frustration involved a significant disconnect between perceptions, bringing that to her attention wasn’t what she needed. She just needed to be heard.  There may be another time to discuss perceptions, but at the time, she just needed to vent.  Acknowledging her frustration, acknowledged her suffering.

“I suffer.  Please help me.”

I can revisit many conversations where I have been angry or discouraged but didn’t want to open myself to the vulnerability of acknowledging my suffering.  How might I have benefitted from that openness?  How might others have been able to help me work through that anger or discouragement?

I invite you to be your own observer of your compassionate listening.  Better yet, invite someone you love and respect to observe for you.  What might you learn?  What might you gain?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here for 15-minute organizing tips.

 

 

Energy Management vs Time Management

“I just don’t have time to . . . . . “  Go ahead, fill in the blank.

Ever said that?  I’ll be you have.  I know I have.

But is it time we don’t have or energy?  If we managed our energy better, would our time management improve?  If we managed our time better, would our energy improve?  What could we accomplish if we managed both just a little better?

Earlier this year I started with a new client.  She said by noon her energy was totally zapped and she just couldn’t get anything done throughout the day, creating a tremendous amount of guilt and anxiety.  Having ruled out health problems, we started to look at her routines, really focusing on where she was spending her time and energy.

Here are just a few examples of what we found:

  1. Nine months ago she became an empty-nester and no longer had the time or energy commitment of children at home. She hadn’t decided on what her next chapter was going to look like (volunteer? go back to work? go back to school?), so now she had all this time on her hands without a clear strategy on how to use it.  She woke up without a blueprint for the day, so the day just slipped away.  At the end of the day, she felt guilty and unfulfilled.  Not having a good time management plan drained her energy.
  2. She didn’t have a good, consistent sleep pattern. She went to bed late because she was easily distracted and didn’t make it through her day’s “to do” list until 1:00 – 2:00 AM. She got up early to see her husband off for the day, but since she’d only slept for about five hours, she was running on empty in the energy department by noon.  Her poor time management the day before affected her energy management the following day.
  3. She loved to shop, consequently spent a lot of time either in stores or online looking for the “perfect . . . .” Again, fill in the blank.  So instead of buying one thing that was “good enough,” she bought several hoping to find “perfect.” This created both a time and energy management problem since she would spend hours returning items she purchased that she wasn’t going to use.  Not creating a boundary around the energy expended looking for “perfect,” resulted in a time management situation when hours were spent coordinating returns.

As we reviewed her routines, we continued to find situations where poor time management affected her energy and situations where she was expending an enormous amount of energy on an activity that in the end had an impact on her time.

To better manage both her time and energy, we created some structure around how she wanted to manage both.

We started with:

Creating a structure that included time for sleep, exercise, meal preparation, social interaction, and mindfulness.

She made a commitment to get in bed by 11:00 PM at the latest.

She didn’t know if she was a Zumba or Yoga girl, a runner or a hiker, a golfer or a tennis enthusiast, so some self-exploration when it came to an exercise routine was necessary.

Because of poor time management and the diminished emotional need to feed “the family,” she and her husband subsided on a significant amount of take-out.  Recreating her vision of “family” as just the two of them, changed her perspective on the value of daily meal preparation.

Because of the previous time commitments for the family, she’d reduced her social interaction in her local community.  Looking for opportunities to become involved in the community, recreating some social connections that may have fallen by the wayside in the day-to-day rush of household management, provided an emotional high that had been missing since the kids moved out.

She included mindfulness in her regular routine.  Focusing on living in the moment, not rehashing the past and living in an undefined future, can provide a great amount of peace and clarity.  Mindfulness can be anything from meditation to a simple walk in the park.  Whatever brings your mind into the present is extremely valuable to mental and physical well-being.

Creating balance and structure has been extremely beneficial for my client to manage her time and energy.  Where might you be out of balance in the time and energy department?

Cindy Jobs, COC, ACC

Looking for more information?

Click here for 15-minute organizing tips.

 

 

 

 

www.organizetosimplify.com

 

 

 

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter Vice-President

 

 

 

International Coach Federation

 

 

 

 

Professional Resource Member

 

 

 

Coach Approach for Organizers

 

 

 

 

Institute for Challenging Disorganization

Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.

Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD