Monthly Archives: November 2017

5 Simple Ways to De-Stress the Holidays

Well, the holidays are officially off and running.  It’s that time of year when many people compare their lives to Rockwell paintings, Martha Stewart magazines, and the social lives of the Kardashian’s.

Rather than the unbridled joy that these images may present, I hear a lot of stress-related concerns from my clients. They are stressed about not having enough time to fit “it all” in.  They are concerned about not being able to create the Rockwell image of the holiday and disappointing their family and friends when it comes to gift-giving and holiday event scheduling.    All of this stress provides the perfect opportunity to have a conversation about what “it all” means and if “it all” is bringing joy to the holiday season or just layering on undue stress.

I encourage my clients to take a few minutes and review priorities to see if the importance of some things may have shifted.  Here are some great places to start:

  1. Be realistic about holiday expectations.  Try not to hold yourself to the Rockwell and Martha Stewart standards (don’t even get me started on Pinterest).  As much as I love outside images for inspiration, it is almost impossible to have our homes and meals live up to the standards presented by professional stylists and photographers.
  2. Edit your schedule.  Do you really need to accept every invitation that comes your way?  No.  Some events may be non-negotiable, like the company holiday party.  That one you should probably attend.  There may be others you can edit out.  For example, do you really need to attend the Book Club mixer on Thursday, when you already are committed the company party on Friday and your child’s holiday recital on Saturday?  Something has to give.  So, when you receive an invitation, ask yourself if this is “must do” and if so put it on the calendar.  If you receive an invitation you aren’t psyched about and the event just feels like an obligation, possibly a polite “no, but thank you for the invitation” may be the correct way to go.
  3. Whenever possible, stick to your routine.  During the holidays, some of us tend to eat too much, drink too much, not exercise, and certainly not get enough sleep.  Neglecting our own personal care causes us to get run down, cranky and possibly sick. It certainly is okay to eat a little differently, have a glass of wine when you may not normally, and stay up a little later than you typically would, but remember “everything in moderation.”
  4. Abandon what’s not important. For many, the holidays are all about tradition.  Well, sometimes our traditions just don’t make sense for the way we currently live our lives.  Does taking the day to press cider and cut down a tree in the forest still bring you joy?  If so, go for it.  If not, let it go.  Are the time, energy, and money spent on gathering items for Santa stockings important to your 17, 21, and 24-year olds?  If so, do it.  If not, let the stocking process go.  Spend that time doing something you truly enjoy.
  5. Ask for and accept some help.  We don’t need to do it all ourselves!  In general, people enjoy being a part of the process and feel a sense of contribution.  Instead of taking on the entire responsibility for huge, festive dinners, make them potluck.  Ask family members to help wrap packages.  Delegate grocery shopping.  Just because we’ve done it all in the past, doesn’t mean we need to continue to do it all ourselves.

The holidays are meant to be joyful and fun for everyone.   Starting with you.

Cindy Jobs

www.organizetosimplify.com

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter
National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter President
ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 website
Institute for Challenging Disorganization
Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.
Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

 

Coach Approach for Organizers
Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration
Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies

Holiday Organizing: Stuff and Time

Well, the holidays are officially off and running!

The local NBC affiliate, KING-TV, asked me to come in and speak about how to organize all the decorations, gifts and events that happen around the holidays.  After leaving the studio I thought “hmm, that might be good information to share on my website.”  Here goes . . .

The holidays create a prime opportunity to take a thoughtful look at how we live, from both a “stuff” and “time” perspective.

Decorating:

I suggest people decorate by zone.  For example, the tree is a zone, the mantle is a zone, possibly the bathrooms are a zone.  What I see happening a lot is that the decorating gets done in time blocks, rarely do we get everything decorated all at the same time.  If we try to decorate throughout the house all within the same time block, areas are only partially decorated, leaving clutter throughout the house.

Make a decision to donate decorations you aren’t using.  Many of us have decorations we take out of storage, then put right back in storage, because we aren’t using them “this year.”  Think about how many years you’ve gone through that process.  If it’s more than a couple, chances are the decorations aren’t your style anymore and can be donated to someone that will use them.  Now is the perfect time to do this vs when you are putting decorations away for the season.  If you do it now, there is a greater opportunity the will get used this year and donation centers aren’t storing them for an extended period of time.

When the season is over, pack decorations away by zone.  This will make it easier to decorate next year.  If possible, use consistently sized, clearly marked boxes.  Being able to stack consistently sized boxes economizes vertical storage space.  I particularly like this style.

Gifts:

Gifts are tricky.  In my line of work, I see a lot of well-intentioned gifts that create clutter and storage challenges.   Some people don’t agree, but I’m a firm believer in re-gifting.  My theory is that if you receive something that isn’t your style and you can’t exchange it for something that is, put it in a gift closet to be re-gifted to someone that would appreciate it.

When thinking about gifting I suggest people sit down for 15 minutes and make a comprehensive list of people they plan to give gifts to and set a budget for each.  Having a list makes gift selection more efficient.  Once you have the list, make a note of anything you remember they’ve expressed an interest in.  Do they stop at a favorite espresso stand every morning?  Are they into a particular video series?  Do they love to scrapbook?  Making a note of their interests next to their name will increase the probability that the gift you select will be less impulsive and more appropriate for the recipient.

When giving gifts, unless you really know what the recipient wants, I suggest consumables that don’t require storage or dusting.  Think about giving experiences or hand-made treats. If you know someone that loves your Cowboy Cookies, give those.  If your specialty is home-made Kahlua, give that.  If you traditionally give gifts to a group of friends, setting a date to just get together and spend time would be magical!

If gift cards are your go-to gift, go with a gift card, but maybe jazz it up a bit.  If your brother likes to go to movies, give a gift card attached to a package of Twizzlers.  Or, if they prefer a particular sporting goods store, give a gift card attached to some hand warmers.

Parties & School Events:

We all appreciate being invited to a party or event, but sometimes the sheer number of events can be exhausting.  Multiple parties on the same weekend.  Family photo sessions.  Endless recitals and craft fairs.  Remember, any time committed to one event takes time away from something else.

Take a look at all the invitations and see what resonates with you.  If you look at an invitation and say “heck yes, that’s going to be a blast!” put it on the calendar.  If, on the other hand, you look at an invitation and say “do we have to?” it’s okay to rsvp “not this year, but thank you for the invitation.”  An invitation doesn’t always require a commitment on your part.

Now, there are invitations that probably need to be thoughtfully considered.  Your company holiday party probably should be attended.  But, the book club mixer could possibly be exchanged for a quiet night at home wrapping gifts.

The same thing goes for school events.  There are some things you just need to do.  Your child’s recital.  Go.  Your second niece’s school holiday bazaar may be something you can pass on.

With so much going on, there are times when parents need to divide and conquerEveryone can’t always go to everything and that’s okay.  Can one parent take the 1-year old to the 8-year old’s craft fair, while the other parent goes to the 6-year old’s soccer practice?

This is also the time to call upon your support structures.  Can you swap baby-sitting with a neighbor so both parents can attend a recital?  Can the grandparents take the kids for a day so all the holiday shopping can get done?  People love to help out, give them a chance.

All of these holiday events can create complicated scheduling opportunities. I recommend families sit down and take time to look at the overall calendar and see what’s possible and what’s not.  Write everything down and see where there are conflicts.  I love using dry-erase boards just for this purpose.  Some of my clients color-code by person so it’s easy to see who needs to be going where at a glance.

Yes, there’s a lot to be thinking about as we head into this busy holiday season.  Rest-assured, with some planning and patience, it can be, as intended, a season of loving, laughing and joy.

Cindy Jobs

www.organizetosimplify.com

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter
National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter Vice President
ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 website
Institute for Challenging Disorganization
Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.
Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

 

Coach Approach for Organizers
Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration
Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies

What does happiness mean to you?

We are nearing the end of Pursuit of Happiness Week.  (Yes, there is such a thing.)  I’m writing this post at the end of the week because I really wanted to pay attention to my own experience of focusing on happiness this week before putting pen to paper.

It was an interesting week of introspection.  When I consciously looked for opportunities to engage with happiness, opportunities appeared in small and large ways.

  • I spent 11 days with my 88-year old mother. Every morning I presented her with a latte with a chocolate powder heart on top.  That made her smile.  Making her smile made me happy.
  • The power went off at our house for eight hours. When it came back on, I was happy  . . . and grateful.  It’s amazing how much more I appreciated heat and lights.
  • Seeing our two rescue Boxers play in the front yard like they didn’t have a care in the world (which they don’t) made me happy. We changed their lives.
  • I take my grandson to indoor soccer practice. Watching 15 4-year olds having the time of their lives and learning a new skill made me happy.

So, tell me, what does “being happy” really mean?

According to dictionary.com, a partial definition of happiness is “Happiness results from the possession or attainment of what one considers good.”

I like this definition.  It brings our own needs and values into play and puts the determination of success in our own hands.  No one else can determine what happiness means to us.  We can not be held to other’s standards of what happiness means. It’s all on us.  We determine what happiness is; only we can determine if we are successful or not.

You’ve probably also heard “Happiness is managing expectations.”  I honestly believe that managing expectations is the key to happiness.

  • I’m an okay golfer. Not a great golfer.  If my happiness was dependent upon being a great golfer I would fail miserably.
  • I makedecent money in my coaching and organizing business. My happiness is dependent upon making changes in others’ lives, not in a large savings account.
  • I have a small but devoted group of friends. If my happiness was dependent upon having the most FB friends, I would be unhappy indeed.

What makes you happy?  What can you control about your happiness?

Cindy Jobs

www.organizetosimplify.com

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter
National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter Vice President
ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 website
Institute for Challenging Disorganization
Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.
Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

 

Coach Approach for Organizers
Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration
Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies

Shhhhh. We just need some quiet.

I just read the most interesting article in the September issue of Real Simple magazine which reminded me of just how little quiet most of us have in our daily lives and how much noise we are subjected to on a constant basis.

We get up and turn on the TV/radio to catch up on the news, weather, and traffic.  We get in our cars and check news, weather, and traffic.  We go into our offices where the phone is ringing, our computers alert when we receive an e-mail or instant message, we attend meetings with lots of people talking (sometimes all at once).  Then, when we leave the office we do it all in reverse, substituting the meetings with entertainment from our TV or other electronic devices.

Even when we are in the great outdoors, we hear cars, plane, trains, lawnmowers, trimmers, leaf blowers . . . it just doesn’t stop!  When do we encounter true peace and quiet?

Interesting statistics according to the Real Simple article:

  • 25% of US adults ages 20-69 show signs of noise-induced hearing impairment.
  • A recent study in Ireland showed 50% of millennials shows early signs of hearing loss, mostly from excessively loud music in their headphones.
  • More than 20 studies have shown that noise pollution can affect children’s learning outcomes and cognitive performance.
  • Any noise over 85 decibels can damage hearing over time.
  • The World Health Organization recommends a limit of 40 decibels overnight to prevent sleep disturbance.
  • What are the decibel levels of items we may encounter every day?

Typical conversation: 60 decibels

Blender: 88 decibels (I started wearing earplugs when I make my daily smoothie)

Barking dog: 90 decibels

Hand Drill: 98 decibels

Sporting event: 100 decibels (unless you were a Seattle Seahawk fan at the stadium in 2013 when the record was set at 136.6 decibels)

Fitness class: 110 decibels (a bit ironic, right?)

So, what can we do about it?

  • Be diligent about ear protection when encountering noise, even for a short period of time.
  • Monitor your environmental noise levels.  There is a handy app for our smart phones to help us with this.
  • Contact your government representatives asking for assistance to create and/or monitor anti-noise laws.

Above all else, find a place and time to give yourself a bit of peace and quiet . . . you deserve it and will likely be more healthy, and possibly smarter, because of it.

Cindy Jobs

www.organizetosimplify.com

National Association of Productivity & Organizing Professionals, Seattle Chapter
National Association of Professional Organizers, Seattle Chapter Vice President
ICD_LogoTag_Horz_72 website
Institute for Challenging Disorganization
Level I Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization; ADD; Client Administration; Time Management; Mental Health; and Hoarding.
Level II Specialist Certificates earned in Chronic Disorganization and ADHD.

 

Coach Approach for Organizers
Graduate of the Comprehensive Training Program: Coaching Essentials; Strengths-Based Coaching; Brain-Based Coaching; Life and ADHD Coaching; and Organizer Coach Integration
Graduate-level training: Body-Based Coaching; ADHD Coaching Competencies